Proverbs 18:13
He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.
How many problems would be solved with proper communication ethics. How many wars would be avoided, how maybe households would find peace, how many marriages would be redeemed and work relationship saved. Maybe it would even help our politicians to bring back ‘civility’ in their debates on hot issues.
I had a conflict with my teenage son the other night. I gave him a command which he wanted to argue. I had to let him know with no uncertain terms that whatever he had to say, disobedience was not acceptable. When he later complained later to his Mom that I was not listening, she explained to him that the best way for one in authority over you to listen to you, is to first indulge them in their command; they will then be more willing to hear your position.
What does it mean to answer a matter before we hear it? The Hebrew verb for ‘hear’, is ‘shamah’, from where we get the word ‘Shema’ in the staple prayer of Judaism. Shema means more than to passively listen. It means to listen, accept, obey and act upon what was spoken. When God tells Israel to ‘shema’, He in fact tells us to hear, listen, subject our spirit to His command and do what He says.
Jewish sages actually taught that the best time to lay your requests at God’s altar is when in the midst or performing an act of obedience. The idea is that when we obey God doing His will, He is happy with us, and it is then a good time to say, “By the way, God, could You please…?” That is why Jewish people always pray for their children during the Sabbath prayer on Friday night. They know that God is pleased to see them obey in sanctifying the Sabbath, so they use that time of favor to pray for their most precious possessions: their kids.
Effective communications require humility, and the apostolic Scriptures do advise us to ‘subject one to another’. May we subject ourselves to each other, by indulging each other’s reasonable request. By listening more, we may find ourselves more heard.
How many problems would be solved with proper communication ethics. How many wars would be avoided, how maybe households would find peace, how many marriages would be redeemed and work relationship saved. Maybe it would even help our politicians to bring back ‘civility’ in their debates on hot issues.
I had a conflict with my teenage son the other night. I gave him a command which he wanted to argue. I had to let him know with no uncertain terms that whatever he had to say, disobedience was not acceptable. When he later complained later to his Mom that I was not listening, she explained to him that the best way for one in authority over you to listen to you, is to first indulge them in their command; they will then be more willing to hear your position.
What does it mean to answer a matter before we hear it? The Hebrew verb for ‘hear’, is ‘shamah’, from where we get the word ‘Shema’ in the staple prayer of Judaism. Shema means more than to passively listen. It means to listen, accept, obey and act upon what was spoken. When God tells Israel to ‘shema’, He in fact tells us to hear, listen, subject our spirit to His command and do what He says.
Jewish sages actually taught that the best time to lay your requests at God’s altar is when in the midst or performing an act of obedience. The idea is that when we obey God doing His will, He is happy with us, and it is then a good time to say, “By the way, God, could You please…?” That is why Jewish people always pray for their children during the Sabbath prayer on Friday night. They know that God is pleased to see them obey in sanctifying the Sabbath, so they use that time of favor to pray for their most precious possessions: their kids.
Effective communications require humility, and the apostolic Scriptures do advise us to ‘subject one to another’. May we subject ourselves to each other, by indulging each other’s reasonable request. By listening more, we may find ourselves more heard.
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